Speaking clearly

Those of us who struggle to communicate in Slovak know the familiar litany of obstacles: the hundreds of word endings that you are supposed to remember; the almost mystical divination of when to use 'y' or 'i'; the fact that some Slovaks seem never to have considered the possibility that a foreigner might try to speak their language, resulting occasionally in the kind of reaction that one might expect were a donkey to start talking.

I could go on; instead, I refer you to The Slovak Spectator's excellent, and often hilarious, Slovak Matters column.

But spare a thought for the locals. While we foreigners may be applauded for trying, mocked (politely, for the most part) for failing, or safely ignored, if you grow up here you had better get it right.

For a Slovak to speak his or her own language in a way that is deemed "incorrect" is to risk being treated as something close to a second-class citizen.

All cultures, of course, place significant store by their members' ability to master the native tongue(s). But Slovaks, whose culture and identity leans particularly heavily on their language, seem especially sensitive to any deviation from the – often-arbitrary – norm.